He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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