ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
And the cops told us we were all naked.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
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