hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
