I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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