are you so shy because you have an std?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
there is puke in my bra ... again
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