I feel great
I just peed on a car
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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