Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
