DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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