i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize