I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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