He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Randomize
