you guys were way drunker than both of me
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
