Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
