I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
