Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
