Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
she looked like the before picture.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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