Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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