It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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