just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize