I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize