"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.