so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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