God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
