When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
