"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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