he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
