So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
do nipples grow back?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
