I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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