I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
