i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
