Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
