I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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