Don't make out with my wife yet
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize