He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
love makes seman taste better
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
