a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
