it wasn't lemon gatorade
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
