After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
