So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
