I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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