So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
