There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
