You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize