My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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