It's just like the Real World with babies
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
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Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
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What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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