i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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