That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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