I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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