i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Small penises have feelings too.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
