Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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