Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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