I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
